Post with 1 note
It does me good to remember that half a lifetime ago this was my paradigm. My worldview was that I would never meet someone who loved me, I would never have a girlfriend, I would be tolerated by people rather than befriended by them, that the best I could hope for was to get a job I didn’t hate and have my ideas and accomplishments stolen by those with better people skills. The nerd group at my school thought I was “a little odd”. Few people shared my sense of humour or my interests, or my sense of humour about my interests. I was rarely happy, I spent a lot of energy fighting depression and was occasionally suicidal…but I had the distinct impression people were trying to get me to commit suicide and I didn’t want to let the bastards win. I spent a lot of time in the worlds of books and my imagination.
Half a lifetime ago…
Now, a decade and a half later, I’m married to the woman of my dreams, my soul mate. The cutest girl I’ve ever met thinks I’m sexy. The most inspiring person I’ve ever met is inspired by me. I’ve learnt more from her than anyone else in my life, and she has learnt lots of things from me. We laugh, we play, we have multiple orgasms together. We travel the world. I have amazing children, gorgeous and funny and tender and smart, who impress me every day. I work at what I want to for money is no constraint. I have friends scattered across the world as well as in my neighbourhood. My life is better than I ever dreamed it could be way back in my adolescence.
It does me good to remember how far I’ve come, how much has changed, so I don’t become complacent and take this joy for granted. All it took was a realisation that I shouldn’t care about the opinions of people I neither liked nor respected and the decision to continually improve my life, just by a little bit. The little bits added up, and they still do; my life is still getting better and I can’t wait to see what it’s like when I’ve doubled my age again.
Need you ask?